I have always rated them above most companies, Qantas are below average, but that's ok, I expect that and was willing to put up with it so as to fly through Singapore. Now all the flights go through Dubai that are worth taking and with them all being Emirates operated, I had high hopes!
The downside was that we only got the lovely and spacious A380 for the first leg which was the shorter of the two of 8 hours and the longer one of over 11 hours was to be a rust bucket by comparison Boeing 777. In my mind, the service I'd experienced before with Emirates would be worth it. Perth please sort out your runway and terminal for the big plane!
Dad taking in the vastness of the beast!
This leg was magnificent (except for the obligatory ignorant arsehole with tonnes of leg room putting his seat right back - oops my foot accidentally kept kicking your chair ... Oh dear, my tray table wouldn't stow properly so I had to smack it a few times ... Oh shit! Did I wake you when I had to to pull the back of your chair twice whilst attending the galley? ... So sorry for calling you an inconsiderate wanker ... ) I think I might borrow a young child or put on ten stone just so I can be the inconsiderate arsehole taking up all the room!
Back to the review. The cabin crew were friendly, attentive and worked so hard to keep everyone happy. Water was brought round every hour and the food was almost decent. I managed to watch a few movies whilst charging my "devices" ( grrrr I hate that term) as well as keeping track on our journey.
Lovely and relaxed, then Dubai happened. We were queued up like cattle at the transfer security area. On getting through I decided to get some water and go for a cigarette. The cigarette didn't happen as I feared for my life on entering the room. It was grim and I wasn't that desperate! I located Macdonalds where it would have been rude not to order a cheeky Big Mac with the water and I'm glad I did because the food wasn't fit to feed a sewer rat on the next leg. More security at the gate where they took my water off me. An absolute disgrace.
On to the rust bucket we got and boy was the customer service a shock. I will NEVER slag Qantas off again. At least they provide water. It took me 3 hours to get a drink and a landing card and then the stupid cow was rude. This particular cow of the thick ignorant variety chucked orange juice all over me and Saturdays Strictly episode, proceeded to clean herself up and fail to apologise. On desperately needing a drink and being ignored I found them all at the back eating food drinking WATER and having a right laugh. They brought water round ONCE.
I was told to sit down and press the button. I did to no avail. Thanks Emirates for sending my lithium levels dangerously high and ruining the first few days of my trip and sort your water fountains out.
I think Emirates have a good in flight entertainment system. I love the Captain and Tail cams for take off and landing and my particular favourite is the flight path maps. When they aren't stuck on Arabic because the cabin attendants can't be fucked restarting the system. It was the only thing keeping me sane on this shit flight and then I couldn't even figure out how long we had. This was NOT helpful
Getting out of Perth Airport requires years of Therapy afterwards. Just when you think you're out, something else happens. Adding Ebola screening made it infuriating but the electronic immigration system is a welcome upgrade. And there is more. Getting through there with no badge of honour stamped into the passport is bad enough but then it's "show and tell" with the officers hanging about on the way to the reclaim area. After having two nice "chats" we get to the slowest moving carousel in the world. On claiming our baggage the relief was immense until yup, you guessed it. Another huge queue for yet another chat and baggage scan. I just wanted someone to kill me now! Finally we got out. It was certainly a journey of two halves. Qantas I apologise, you are upper class compared to these bloody idiots, at least you bring drinks round and smile and are polite!
At least the weather is nice to help me get over what nasty bug was recirculating through the cabin!
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